Once again we were made very welcome at Hinksey Heights Golf Course. We had been going there, on and off, every since we were fortunate to be their Captain’s Charity of the year in 2016. As some of our members are clinically extremely vulnerable to Covid we are looking for well ventilated places to meet, and they have a marquee we were able to use.
They were also able to provide table service for food and drinks, which was much appreciated.
We very much enjoyed our last picnic at Kenninton church, and once again the kind church people opened their doors to us for another picnic, this time literally.
The weather was much less kind, and the rain soon drove us inside, which fortunately is a large, well ventilated space. Due to the weather, and some members being away on holiday, there were only 7 of us, but one was someone we have not seen for a while but was a member when we went to Holland, and on narrowboat trips, so the old hands could reminisce, and members who had not been could hear about those times.
After a long spell of not being able to meet in person, Oxford Phab are looking for safe ways of getting together. We followed up our Picnic at Kennington Church with a walk at Farmoor Reservoir.
About a dozen of us met at the car park, and made our way up the slope to benches out side the cafe, which was closed for the day. Then those of us who had bought picnics ate them, and we chatted, and enjoyed the view, including some rapidly moving sailing boats.
Once everyone was ready we set off to walk across the causeway which divides the reservoir in two. We enjoyed seeing the ducks, grebes, cormorants and coots as well as, for some of us, the joy of finding a new place with level access.
By the time we had returned to the car park and everybody who was being collected had departed the sun was setting, a lovely sight over the waters of the reservoir.
Oxford Phab has not met in person since Tom’s quiz in March 2020, due to the need to stay safe during the Covid Pandemic. We are really grateful to St Swithun’s church in Kennington for allowing us to meet in their lovely grounds and bring food to have an open-air picnic.
The weather was perfect, very sunny, with a gentle breeze, and would have been too hot, but for the shade provided by the trees. There was also a lovely wildflower meadow.
It was such a change to see people in real life again, and although video meetings are much better than nothing, they do not suit everybody, so we have not seen some members for over a year.
We even celebrated a birthday – with cup cakes for covid-safety.
At the moment nobody knows what the future holds, but it was good to get back to Making More of Life Together.
In the nature of Phab, Oxford Phab members are a diverse bunch, and lockdown has affected us in different ways, but at the same time there are things which are the same for all of us.
Before lockdown a keystone of Oxford Phab was our normal club meetings at Wesley Memorial Church on a Friday night. Whenever possible we ran a minibus to bring members who could not otherwise get there, and did art and craft activities, played games, cooked and/or ate meals together. All the activities could be enjoyed by all our members, and also – something we appreciate more now that this is harder to do, we could just rage against the injustice of the world, chat, smile or laugh.
We do our best to replace this by getting together over the Internet for a chat on a Friday night, and also another chat session on a Monday night.
Meeting like this is a valuable social contact, but we are very aware that not all of our members can meet this way. Not everyone has access to the Internet and it does not provide the chance for smaller chats about subjects which might be deeply interesting to a small subset of our members, and deeply boring to the rest. I do still have occasional Jitsi chats with Phab friends to ensure the world continues to be set to rights.
The wider Phab
Another thing we did under the ‘old normal’ was to get together with members of other Phab clubs. While getting together in person is not possible at the moment the National Phab are organising quiz sessions through Facebook, which we then link to from our Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/oxfordphab/ and some of our members join in those sessions.
Loss and remembering
Lives cut untimely short are not a completely new experience for us. Roy Lewis, who was chairman of Oxford Phab several years ago, was someone who everyone who was fortunate enough to know him will always remember. His wisdom, kindness, intellect and optimism certainly inspired me. He was also a ruthless draughts player, and could knock back Brandy and Babycham when we were out and about with an impressive lack of impact on his ability to hold an intelligent conversation on a wide range of subjects. He was not the first member we have lost, and there have been several others since, but I, and as many members as could, made a special effort to join the diverse group of mourners at his funeral.
It is particularly hard to lose Kelly at a time when we can not gather to mourn and remember. Although in many ways a completely different person to Roy, she too had an astonishing range of friends, inside and outside Phab who will miss her very much. One of the things which makes Phab special is that we find common ground within our diversity.
One of the things Kelly enjoyed at Phab was Zumba, and we are very fortunate that George Martini is able to do online Zumba sessions with us on Friday Nights, which we follow with a chat (as we did when we all met up at Wesley Memorial).
This can be just as energetic as face-to-face Zumba – and we are sometimes joined by people who have supported Phab through running garden parties, helping out selling refreshments and so on, who would not normally be able to join in, as well as particularly close members of other Phab clubs.
We were really excited about our planned holiday to Avon Tyrrell in August, but have had to cancel that due to the virus. We have to make do, for now, with remembering the fun we had last year, and in 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015 and all the other jolly holidays we have had.
Nobody can be sure what the future will hold, but we hope we can learn from these difficult times, continue to support each other in new ways, as well as old and that the strengths which have brought us through previous crises will bring us though this too. We appreciate the support we have had from Wesley Memorial Church, friends and families of members, carers and NHS staff.
Tom’s wide range of questions reflected his wide range of interests, as well as the interests of club members. We played in teams, which was lucky, as the chances of a single individual (apart, presumably from Tom) being able to recognise, in the picture round, scenes from Paw Patrol and Gone with the Wind, were pretty slim.
Every year we make pancakes before Lent, and this year was no exception. The pancakes were cooked in the kitchen, and then we could add our preferred toppings out of a wide selection, ranging from the traditional sugar and lemon, through oranges with chocolate sauce to Biscoff sauce.
Our trusty minibus took us though the stormy weather to Houslow for an Art and Craft session. We are very fortunate to have our own transport, which not only allows us to take part in activities with other clubs – like this one, and to go on holidays and other trips, but to do a pickup on a Friday night when circumstances allow. It is five years since our very first club outing in the silver minibus, which was also to Hounslow Phab Art and Crafts day.
Hounslow Phab had organised a range of activities, such as decorating eggs, hama beads, making keyrings and pictures frames.
They also, for those who had booked this, provided tasty cheese burgers, salads etc.
Despite the pleasures of the day we were pleased to return safely to Oxford.